ReHash #402

Hash Trash

Ithaca Hashers:

What do I remember of the hash last week? Well, Beams and I had not decided for sure if we would do the hash or not. We DID take our hashing clothes and shoes in case we decided to with us to Sodus. Sunday morning came, and after some house work on the family cottage, we decided that we did need to hash. We packed up and headed south. Beams pointed out that there were a couple of Coors Lights in the fridge. I noticed that there were some warm Heinekens in the pantry, and if I had been thinking last night, they would now be cold, but we had to settle for my favorite beer, the one that’s already cold! We drove through a couple of pretty heavy downpours, but things were fairly clear as we got closer to Ithaca. As we got close, we called Ball Wrinkle to see how close he was, fully expecting that he would be there by then, since he had the beer. After a few communications problems, we were able to get a steady signal and not loose the call after a few seconds. We learned that he was NOT at the start, and that the beer was warm, so we were charged with getting ice for the beer. A little later we saw a turkey by the road, oh wait, that was just Butt Floss’s car by Hungman’s house. But just before that we actually DID see a wild turkey cross the road. Why? I don’t know, but if you ask about the ckicken . . . Anyway, we arrive at the start where about 15 or so hashers are milling about with no beer. We let them know that BW is on the way and head off to get ice. When we return, the hashers are still milling about, but now they have ice. BW shows up shortly there after and tells about Puker’s deer hangover while he ices the beer down. Hungman shows up with 2 virgins and it appears that we should begin. Floss gives a chalk talk which very few actually pay attention to, and then they all start asking questions about the marks. "What’s that?" "That’s an arrow." "What’s that?" "That’s an On" "What’s that" "That’s a circle, jerk."

Alright, enough fooling around. Off we go on trail. While the pack scatters and looks for trail in every direction, BW and I open a beer for trail. By the time we camo the beer (duct tape works well for everything, except duct work), the pack is headed fully to the south. I decide to take a short cut, and am able to convince unnamed parties to go along. Unnamed party and I cross the highway and a swampy area to stumble on a false. Following the false back leads us to a whichy-way. After peeing, we debate if we should go forward in search of beer, or back to ensure that we do not miss beer. We decide that it is best that we follow trail back towards the pack so that we do not get TOO far in front and miss the beer check. That would be bad. Off we go, no-no, to find the pack. We discover a check. Now we are completely unsure of being in front or behind the pack and decided that we must press on, backwards, to find the pack and the beer. Eventually, unnames person and I began to realize that, since we had not seen flour in about a mile, and had not heard anyone since the start, we were probably not going the right direction. We finally decided to loop back towards the direction we assumed the hash was probably now (and assumed theye were enjoying beer without us). We cut through a field and startled a coyote who started at us for quite some time before deciding to head into the brush. We next saw a deer trying to stay hidden in the brush. Then we found the power line where we had first found flour, but were now much further up the line (in the direction I originally wanted to go). As we worked our way back towards the start, we ran into the hash at a margerita stop. We were able to get a drink and some cheezy poofs before moving on-on again.

The trail proceeded down the power line past the spot where unnamed person and I has stumbled on trail. Appearently, we were in front of the pack in the opposite direction we thought, and going backwards was really forwards, and if we had gone the direction I originally had wanted to go (I though forwards, but turned out to be backwards) we would have reached the margerita stop 10 minutes into the hash. Oh, well. The hash continued and went up and up and up past a nicee lookout area that would have been great for the beer check that was certainly not too far in front of us. No, no beer stop there, ,but there was more up. Then, suddenly, the trail went down. We are on asphalt now and pounding back down towards downtown Ithaca. A check by the bridge and hashing down by the river brought us back to the park near the start and Floss’s car. Not seeing any beer nearby, I continued back to BW’s truck where there was beer. I grabbed a couple of beers to tide me over and headed back to the end of the hash. There I gave BW his keys so he could bring the beer over.

We had a nice BBQ with dogs, burgers, and hockey pucks for all. There were ever a few sausages or pork products of some kind. Down downs were plenty. The hares did several, haring, no actual beer check, something about really crappy marks. A large group did one because they all went straight to the end from the start even though no flour lead there. Visitor and new boots drank. Come lately’s drank. BLAB and BLEB drank. Late arrivers and pretty well dressed Dances and Found It! drank for cumming late and being so well dressed. hungman drank for hitting on his patient’s friends (bringing the newboots). Two bikers drank for biking the trail, and one for hash crash. It’s all kinda blurry to me, so maybe someone who remembers can fill in some of the details of the ceremonies. There were trophies, but I can’t remember who won the hash. Anyway, a good time was had by all. on-on

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