ReHash #398

As I drove down to Ithaca from Rochester, I was
thinking to myself, WTF? They have some SNOW down
here. As I drove up the road leading to the start, I
was wondering if I’d be pulling anyone out of the
ditch this week.

I pulled up to the gathering pack of cars at about
2:15 just in time to see Mr. "Let’s start starting on
time" parking his car. I won’t say who that was.

So I let the dog out (who was going nuts in the back
of the truck cab), grabbed my $5, Hat, etc. and made
my way to the beer.

A pretty good crowd was shaping up, including Shiggy
Shiggy Gang Bang, who hasn’t been hashing for a while.
It was snowing steadily, and there was a growing
concern that the trail marks would be hard to see.
The Hares, Toothy Lunker, and Scooby Snatch started
the chalk talk. I didn’t listen, but I assume they
talked about the trail markings, and maybe gave some
hints about weird stuff that might be encountered on
trail. Off we went into the 12 or so inches of
new-fallen snow.

The trail was full of awesome wet muddy shiggy, that
was somewhat buffered by the major recent snowfall.
The pack had a little trouble solving a few of the
checks, but finally figured out that we should look
for footprints, since the hares couldn’t have set the
trail by hover-craft. After that realization, we did
a bit better. Still, it was tough to find footprints
with the dogs running all over, messing up the virgin
snow.

The 1st beer stop was close to an old abandoned school
bus, that looked like a family of illegal immigrants
had lived in it for a year or 2 it was so full of
kipple(junk). Near to the 1st bus was a second bus
even fuller of junk. A couple of dead cars and a
barrel were keeping the bus company.

We hashed ON! …to an area that I recognized as the
place where Spaceman tossed a few people into a pond,
I lost my sunglasses, and we found several baby pot
plants growing in a nearby field. The water wasn’t
frozen at that previous hash either.

I’m late for an appointment while writing this, so
Fast Forward to the end of the run. It was cold so
the pack voted to retire quickly to an indoor venue.
Before we all scattered, we had to give Shiggy Shiggy
Gang Bang a Side-Side for her birthday. Hot lips
bolted for home as he almost always does.

** Listen up Hot Lips **
It was decided by the ON-IN Pack that the hash is
going to start keeping score. You owe the hash 3
Down-Downs. One for a hash crash, another for comes
lately, and a 3rd for Premature Checkulation.

The rest of us streamed down the hill to Toothy Lunker
& Fishy Fingers place. I hesitated while 1/2 Monty
fiddled with his car. I thought it had broken down,
but he explained later that he has to move a vacuum
hose under the hood to switch in and out of 4WD.

This is one of the 1st ON-INs where the hashers were
nearly outnumbered by the Dogs! We had – Tala, Roxy,
Toby, Hershey, Maggie, and Jana. Well, not really,
but that’s a shitload of dogs when you’re standing at
a beer stop and they are barking, playing, fighting,
and, well, being dogs. Almost all of them joined us
at the ON-IN, since it was dog-friendly. (Toothy &
Fishy Fingers place) There were only a few fights.

At the ON-IN we enjoyed M&Ms, Pork Pieces, Kippers,
Pickled Watermelon, Caviar, Chips, Salsa, and more.
It was all great except for the Pork Pieces. Yuk!
The caviar tasted like fishing bait, but I guess some
people like the taste of fishing bait.

Dances with Head had a little trouble getting the
circle started with all that good chow, but finally
succeeded. We toasted to the hash as is customary.
Floss & LOA drank for being the BLABs, All the non dog
owners drank because they were outnumbered. Calvin
Klimax did a Side-Side for his birthday. We attempted
to give LOA a down down for piercings unless she was
willing to show ALL of them to us. F’em and C’em did
a down down for her seamstress-ness. Apparently she
made Butt Floss a clothing item of some kind. We made
Dances w/ head drink for not having his mug. He says
he lost it, so he drinks every hash until a
replacement mug arrives, which may be never.

Fishy Fingers arrived about this time, so he did a
down down for being a Bobbit. The hares drank, and by
accusation, or one means or another, everyone in
attendance got a down down.

We paused for a moment of seriousness mid-circle to
allow those that knew Soggy Biscuit to share some of
their stories and feelings for the hasher that was
recently killed. For those that never met Soggy, I
assure you that to know him was to love him. He was a
great guy and will be sorely missed. So we raised our
glasses and had a toast to Soggy Biscuit.

The hash was attended by…
Hot Lips, Toothy Lunker, Shiggy Shiggy Gang Bang, Butt
Floss, Little Oral Annie, Scooby Snatch, 1/2 Monty,
Fuck ’em & Chuck ’em, Calvin Klimax, Spike, Dances w/
Head, Fishy Fingers, & Ball Wrinkle (me)

Oh! I almost forgot. After the circle, we did a
little 1/2 brain storming, and the idea of creating a
spoof 4H camping t-shirt was hatched. Toothy has an
example shirt from when she was a camper herself. If
you can believe it, it even still fits. A little
tightly, but that’s OK. Nudge, Wink. So the idea is
to replace the H H H H with I H H H, and to replace
the Hands, Health, Heart, Head (who said head?) with
something like Run, Drink, Party, Pass Out.

On Out until next time
Ball Wrinkle