IH3 Trail #451

I awoke to the dull roar of my head informing that it had been one hell of a Hash Weekend thus far…..and to the noise of numerous hashers mulling about our house. SHUT THE F*CK UP! CAN’T YOU TELL WE ARE TRYING TO SCREW…I MEAN SLEEP!

Then, I remembered….it’s Sunday….a normal Ithaca Hash day….and we had much to do before hash time. Like, get all the drunks up and around and off to breakfast before setting out on Hound Whore’s trail. Speaking of? Where was he? Had he left early to prepare the third awesome trail of the weekend? Third you say? Yes indeed! For this was not an "ordinary" hash weekend. It was none other that the First Anal-versary Hashl! or/ette Weekend for Butt Floss and Little Oral Annie. The weekend’s events, thus far, had actually been quite memorable…despite the outrageous amounts of alcohol consumed. Starting with a fun little pub crawl Friday night…..beer pong on a make shift table comprising one small dining table and a coffee table…..and SUPER trail Saturday set by Toothy and F*ckem & Chuckem…complete with hot toddies and wine!…wine trail…awesome dinner put on by Goldie Cocks….strip club where Butt Floss got his backside whipped severely with his own belt….then showed off his new Tux Floss…compliments of Staffy Puller and Tequila Bill…to the crowd of horny, drooling, lecherous men…oh, wait…those were the hashers…getting hit on by Drag Queens at the piano bar while the harrierettes were at brew pubs….ah yes, I do remember it! But, I digress. Now, presuming that Hound Whore had left us to set trail…..the rest of went to feast in town. Unfortunately, many of the "out of towners" had to head on home and could not partake of the afternoon’s hash.

But….WE DID!

The trail started at the Blue Berry Recreation area parking lot up in the National Forest. A smaller crowd was assembled than the previous day but, anxious for the trail ahead….and….BEER!!!!…just the same. In attendance were: Hound Whore…our hungover hare….Spike….Hot Lips….Just Eric (dire need of a true hash name by now!)…Cock Smith…Pippi Schlongstocking….LOA….Butt Floss…Dances……Maxi Pad and Arlo. Others? Sorry…getting foggy….oh….and Just Eric’s pooch. :o)

Soon, we were off…some on snow shoes….some on skis….. It was another glorious day to be out in the woods and enjoying nature. Hashing is so much fun in this area that I think I will stay around for awhile…. :o) The trail meandered here…and there….but mostly there….and I soon found myself at the back of the pack after checking out almost every false the #!#@$%@#$%!#$% hare set! But, alas, what do I hear????…..BEEEEEER….NEEEEAAAAR! Alright! Now it’s time to reload the liver!

Off again! This time, our trail approached dangerously close to the previous day’s trail. So close in fact that we lost Hot Lips completely. But, we didn’t realize this until AFTER Floss went back about half a mile looking for him. Man, is he going to drink at circle!…if he actually is still there….we know how Hot Lips likes to slink off in the middle of the trail…going to have to tie that boy to a tree one of these years and make him drink a case all by himself! :o)

At this point, the trail had taken a sharp turn back along Potomoc road and on back to the start. Awesome trail Hound Whore!!!!!

Circle was short…but good. Every one drank….at least once…well, except for Hot Lips who escaped…..

Finally, we adjourned circle and went back home to pass out…….but not before finding all sorts of wonderful things left behind by the hashers:

Numerous Ninny Valley beer-pong balls

New Shoez pillow….nice that he left that behind in place of his mug that he finally recovered

HO’s sweat shirt…..small replacement for all of LOA’s hash clothes that Sir stole…

Blue fleece

Shampoo and tooth paste

Of course….some one left there loofa sponge….UNBELIEVEABLE!

Country Cock left his sneakers behind. Apparently he doesn’t plan to hash again until LOA and I set another trail….

MATTRESS! Yes, a whole mattress! How the hell do you forget THAT!….Big Stonz!? :o)

Nicely framed note that I’m the best…or was that for LOA?

Raidr’s plastic hash mug…

And much more! Yard sale time!!!!!

Corrections?

Floss