IH3 Trail #415

Rehash — weekend of 10/24/2003

It was the weekend before Halloween, and all through Ithaca, the ghosts and ghoulies were getting restless. One hash wasn’t enough for those wankers, so they had three.

Sunday, Oct. 26th — After recovering from a nasty hangover and crawling out of bed, I drove down to Perry City for a hash by Half Monty. I pulled in a little after 3:10 in front of a rustic looking A-frame house, right behind where Ball Wrinkle and Extra Testicle were comparing their trucks by the keg of black forest, Half Monty was in the vicinity, and Hot Lips was driving past, while Just Hershey and Puker roamed around. With a slight twist of my arm by BW, I nursed my hangover with some beer and waited for more hashers. Soon, in addition to the five of us, there was Spike, Scooby Snatch, and Grande Chucha who hash crashed his car. With a quick tug (from ET’s truck), all was good, and there was much rejoicing. As the crew grew restless, and Hershey told us to get on trail, we chalk-talked and checked it out, and said goodbye to the injured ET (see Friday’s tale).

On-into the woods we went, on-5, on-8, on-FALSE! And on-back we went. While we discovered a number of falses without even leaving site of the start, Butt Floss and Little Oral Annie pulled up and joined in. Finally, Grande C found true trail, and we were off down the road, and down into the woods, through burrs and thorn-bushes, and on-up into a field. BW and Spike discussed nuts while others journeyed from check to check in the path-covered field. Then, all of a sudden, an angry hunter/landowner barged in on our fun! Apparently we were scaring away all the deer on the land he pays 56 grand a year to hunt on, or some nonsense like that. Half Monty gave him a talking to and we scurried off with our tails tucked between our legs. On-on we whispered, until we found a beer check, and there was much rejoicing. ET was there with half a case of Beast by a rusted out junk car, with two old sofa chairs on top and a herd of horseback riders on their own scavenger hunt-type activity, as well as the owner of this property, who was much nicer and drank with us. The view was spectacular, looking over fields and down to Cayuga Lake, but alas, we departed back on trail again. Down and around the roads we went (but not far), and found a cooler of beer and chips stashed off the side of the road . . . BEER! . . . and there was much rejoicing. Puker gave me (Dances) good head, while BW came on Puker’s tail. Oh what a mess! But then the chips and the beer were gone, or close enough, and we got ready to head out on trail again when Grande drops an unopened beer on the ground, creating a tiny hole in the can that sprayed a fine mist of beer in the air around in. So what does Grande do, but puts it to his mouth, and at the suggestion of Monty, he opens the top to chug, but gets a facial of beer! Woohoo!

The On-in was near, so we approached and attacked the keg. Gathering round, we opened circles, and down-downs were enjoyed. BW and Monty drank for haring, Floss and LOA drank for cumming lately, I (Dances) and LOA came for BLEAB and BLAB, Grande drank for hash crashing, dog owners drank, furthest and nearest travelers drank, Spike Grande and I drank for first bastards in, LOA drank because she’s overathletic, LOA, Floss, Grande, and Scooby drank for moving recently, LOA drank for this, LOA drank for that, and various other down-downs were awarded. BW gave out fun trinkets including a 4-H shirt to Spike, a Tour de Chug mug to Spike and a toss-up book "The Hare of the Dog" to Scooby. Circle was closed, wienies were grilled, dog tricks were done, and we went inside to stay dry. . . . and there was much rejoicing. :o)

Faithfully submitted, D. W. Head, Esquire.

The End.

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Hey Dances, you forgot the part where we offered up HotLips as a sacrifice to the Hunter God so we could continue on our way!

LOA