IH3 Trail #721: CoCo’s Return to Ignominy

IH3 Hash #721

June 22, 2014

Hare: Cold Cocked

Hounds:

Just Jen and her dog Ellie

Virgin Dana

PG

Baster

Kickstand

Head

Nurse

Spike

Brownie

Ookie

Tastes Like 10th Grade

While gathered around the keg leftover from PG and Baster’s nerd wedding, Hashers gathered at Chez Cocked on Hunt Hill Road and waited for Kickstand to arrive.  Just Jen brought strawberries to share and lost property was vandalized before it had to be returned to its rightful owner.

Although it was the defiantly naked hash, no one was actually naked.  There were several states of near-nudity, however, including shirtlessness from Brownie, Spike and CoCo, a completely see-through tank top on Peeg, Kicky’s famous nothing-left-to-the-imagination spandex shorts, Baster’s sharpie-decorated white boxer briefs and a double-ended outfit from Tasty, compliments of a new shirt from PG and Baster with a penis-windmill on it and the return of the Cock Shorts from Brownie and Nurse.  The shorts were considerably looser when they were given back to Tasty and much speculation was had regarding how they became thus.

Soon, wanks were piling into the cab and back of CoCo’s truck to be dropped off at our starting point, the Hartung-Boothroyd Obervatory which sits atop Mount Pleasant.  This, according to MapQuest, coincidentally, is exactly 4.20 miles away, following roads.  We were lucky to be able to all fit into the truck —> Spike was crunched up like an accordian and Head nearly spilled over the side each time we took a turn.

Through Cornell fields we searched for flour while blue skies and sunshine hung above us in perfect summertime weather.  It was not long before we were in the woods, however, and the sunscreen that had been squirted in abundance was no longer necessary.  Baster discovered that his all-natural bug spray was actually an attractant, not a repellant. We ran down a mossy path and the harriettes had fun ‘dirty dancing’ their way across fallen trees and singing “Hey Baby.”

CoCo had warned us about an ‘R’ that if we blew through it we would be cuntfused due to there being marks past it that led to private property.  Sure enough, we spied Kicky and a few other FRBs down at the bottom of a hill while true trail actually went along the hillside. We called them up to us and good thing, too, because on our way down the road/driveway the property owner came up to us with his dog and asked what we were doing. NOTHING! NOBODY NAKED OR WEIRD HERE, SIR! Please remember that Tasty was wearing very graphically detailed spandex shorts and so was CoCo (even though his were completely black, they were still graphically detailed).

By this time, our little kennel of hounds was getting mighty thirsty and we were finally rewarded with a BN.  Unfortunately, we then had to scramble up the steepest hill EVER to be able to drink it safely away from the road.  We sat around enjoying our almost-cold-enough beer, discussing details of the hash weekend and the details of the Cock Shorts. Far too soon we were moving up the hill again and through the woods —> CoCo did not let us down with flour quantity, we will no longer be able to call him “The Flourless Wonder” but instead we may need to change that to “Beerless Wonder”. One BN. ONE. Thankfully, when we arrived at ON-IN Mr. Keg was there waiting for us and it was cold and delicious.

Down Downs were given to virgins (Dana), lost property owners (Kicky), dog owners (Just Jen), for marriage (PG and Baster), aiding r*cism (Kicky), for shitty trail (CoCo), for stretching out the Cock Shorts (Brownie) and an Up Up was given to Tasty for turning 40. Twice. A re-do was performed for pictures after Tasty’s camera/phone died. Sorry, Nurse, it wasn’t your fault.

On-On!

-Tasty