A Drinking Club with a Running Problem
It was like Grassroots, only a few months late.
That’s about what I was thinking anyway, as I was pulling into the Trumansburg Fairgrounds to meet the hashers. And Brr! It was chilly for Fall. Daylight Savings Time had just come to an end also, so I was hoping that I had my watch set correctly. Turns out that I did, as Licker Harder, Hot Lips, and Cocktail Frank were there waiting. Soon others followed: Spike, Butt Floss, ET, Harry Condom Jr, Bedside Pole-Dancer, UFO, Country Cock, Porcelain Goddess, Just Dave (virgin), Pippi Schlongstocking, Cocksmith, Jiffy Lube, Master Baster, and TOFU all arrived (did I miss anyone? – it was a big crowd). I also counted at least 4 dogs (Mindy, Arlo, Crazy Eyes, and *oops I forget Bedside’s dog’s name*). Hot Lips also got a bin full of ripe mini-kiwi fruits for us to chow down on.
After a few of us started to get the itch for trail, Hot Lips gave chalk talk, and we were off. Down and around the Fairgrounds we went… and found a slew of Falses. Back onto the road, where we found a couple more. Finally, trail was found going into the woods, opposite the entrance to the Fairgrounds. ET and I shortcutted around the woods, to the cemetery a block over, and were soon rejoined by the gang. Through the cemetery we went, in a bit of a circle. Then back on the road again, we ended up following a creek up a dirt road towards a railroad bridge and a Hash Rest. We let stragglers catch up, and ET and Baster climbed the rusted steel struts holding the bridge up, while the rest of us wondered whether their life insurance policies were up to date.
But without waiting long, some eager hounds found trail again, leading to a BC6 overlooking a pretty section of the creek. We found our way back up 6 marks, and followed true trail across the creek at a safer point. Some of the harriers even were courteous enough to give piggyback rides to their harrierette counterparts.
From here there was a bit of road-running, followed by running across a field or two, followed by running through orchards. All of which was quite a pleasant area to run through. Hot Lips gave DFLs like myself a shortcut tip, while the speedy f*ckers at the front wound through the trees. We approached the BN however, and found beer by a beautiful pond, and rejoiced heartily. Snacks and Coors Light and water were shared.
When we were finally satisfied by beverage and snack, Hot Lips informed us that trail started with a BC4. The hash proceeded then to forget to count to 4, and Hot Lips found himself shouting “I said Back Check 4, not Back Check 24!” :o) But this part of trail was just a big circle jerk, as we came out right by the BN again. 🙁
Trail led back to the road, where the fleet of foot quickly dashed out of sight of the DFLs. Bedside, UFO and myself – the DFLs – shortcutted towards the ON-IN, while the rest of the hounds enjoyed a jolly good bit of exercise. After what seemed like forever, the pack arrived to the ON-IN, and snacks and beer were gotten out for circle. Brownies and chocolate sperm samples were shared, as were traditional salty snacks.
Hot Lips and Jiffy Lube drank for working together to set a shitty trail, Just David drank for being a virgin, I was given an Up-Up for turning 30, Cocktail Frank drank out of his shoe for new sneakers, and the usual accusations were dispensed. Hilarity and shenanigans ensued. Harry Condom gave her blow-up stud muffin doll to Licker Harder, while ET gave the Hashit funnel to Master Baster.
On-After followed. We went to Little Venice for more beer, food (some had all-you-can-eat crab legs!), hanging out, and watching football on the bigscreen tv.
On-out,
-Dances With Head