IH3 Trail #409

Sunshine was the the best way to describe the day. And it was a perfect day for hashing. I followed Scooby’s excellent directions down some back roads in Newark Valley, and from the crest of a hill I could see HHH flour marks at the hash start. Things seemed pretty quiet, but I found a cooler containing beer, and sat down with a newspaper to enjoy the sun. Soon after, hares Scooby Snatch and Just Jay joined me. Eventually, Butt Floss, LOA, Ball Wrinkle, and Half Monty made their appearances. And, of course, Puker was also there. The trail followed a dirt road into the woods, a false led into a swampy area. Some shiggy eventually led to more trails. Scooby had promised me that there was no poison ivy in any of the hash, and he was right! He will be offering a workshop on how to avoid setting trail through poison ivy. I believe attendance is mandatory for Butt Floss, LOA, Spike, JarJar, Bitch Squealer, Dances, PingPong, and Hot Lips. Newark Valley has some really nice trails, and some pretty respectable shiggy. After exploring the area for a while, we came to a welcome BN. After a leisurely rest, we forged on, mostly to escape the mosquitoes. Half Monty was r*nning?! It is suspected that he has been hash training in private, as none have seen this athletic display from him on prior hashes. Eventually we came to another BN. Unfortunately, Ball Wrinkle wanted a cigarette, and spurred us to leave this nice resting spot more quickly than we really wanted. I believe later he also did some premature checkulashun, in order to get a little closer to Philip Morris. After a nice jog through the woods and some more shiggy, we found ourselves… right back where we started, which, coincidentally, was the location of the on-in. We didn’t waste too much time getting the circle started, as accusations were flying before the trail ended. Floss drank for being a little too observant of Rowdy’s sports bra, and naive (he never saw a sports bra with a hook before!). Ball Wrinkle drank for premature checkulation. Scooby and Just Jay drank for setting shitty trail. Just Kim and Just Kara drank for being bobbit types. Half Monty was dubbed FRB, I was dubbed BLEEB. Just Jay was named and baptized "Skips Like a Bitch". The entertainment continued well after the circle ended. Scooby, Skippy, Just Kara, and Just Kim grilled burgers and hot dogs for us. Scooby contributed to the fine cuisine with scrumptious pig hocks and herring. I told him that herring are used for bait in Maine, and that no one should actually eat them. Ball Wrinkle beat Half Monty in horseshoes. Songs of Chicago department stores were sung, and more…

Great hash Scooby Snatch and Skips Like a Bitch, Thank you!

On on
Rowdy Bush