ReHash #160

Hashers,

Almost all hashers at the off week Halloween hash showed up across from the chapter house in costume. . . some were better than others. There were some hashers who decided that as long as they didn’t look normal, they were in costume. Heinous as the green and yellow banana head thing and Toothy Lunker as a cat with purple feather eyes are good examples of this. Prickless and Dexter proved that cavepeople and dinosaurs did live at the same time and we got to witness the evolution of mammals after Stegadex went for a swim in the gorge and lost her spines. We had a plethora of people with capes trying to be vampires. Bam Bam (with red triangles on his lower lip where he drooled blood from his last feeding) stayed in character during the run and tried to fly down to the gorge yelling "I can’t get hurt, I’m already dead!" as he slid to the bottom.

The one person who came without a costume was punished severely both during and after the hash. Dana was one of the few hashers who found the rope we were supposed to climb down into a courtyard behind the plant science building. Once Dana reached the bottom, Hot Lips (a very cute squirrel) untied the rope and ran off in the other direction leaving Dana to find his way alone. Fortunately Dana heard the distant cries of ON ON and was able to catch up.

The hash serenaded Dishonorable (hippie) and Neel (graduate) with a rousing rendition of "Why were they born so beautiful" in three part harmony from atop a hill trying to lure them back to the hash rest. They ran the other way, ending the hash rest and forcing us to leave the stragglers (such as Dana) behind. Those hashers, like myself, fortunate enough to be a straggler and run with Hot Legs during this hash got to hear him mumble incessantly about losing his scabs, his skin peeling off, his blood was running and other problems I could only hope were costume flaws and not contagious.

We ended the hash at Schultzies balcony where Shultzie was waiting for us all clean and dry. Since Black Hole told me that Captain Weeny being late is NOT news (and this rehash contains only news) I will not say that Captain weeny was the blab. I will say, however, that he ran the entire hash alone but showed up in time to get the Lorena Bobbit cutting it all off award. As expected at a Halloween hash, several people got to drink for their costumes (or lack of costumes). Bam Bam was the most pathetic even if he did try to fly, the green and yellow banana head thing and the cavewoman tied as the best costume, and the lovely ladies Spike and someone whose name I never learned got to drink for their drag. Dishonorable the hippie is this weeks hash shit and I pity whoever gets the shirt next after where

he put it while we sang. I also pity him for having put it there. We had a problem at this ON IN with hashers mistaking the gorge for their heads after they drank. Homoses got Jabba the Hut from Klaus not only for his lack of aim but also his willingness to point out lack of aim in others. Another award that is no longer news went to Klaus who was once again the most enthusiastic hasher ever. He runs all the really steep, muddy, wet false trails and never, ever finds the right ones. He is a better indicator of where the trail goes than the hares are. Hares can forget, Klaus does it by instinct.

There is no movie review this week because I haven’t seen any movies. I am told that the rehash should also contain a receding hare line of hares and hashes to come. Since none of you will probably read this until after this Sundays hash it is useless for me to tell you where it is. The hash after this one is being set by Toothy and someone else at some unknown destination.

-Hairy Vetch